Rear View Mirror...its adjustable for a reason!

Finally...I'm in my car. Those small talkers in the elevator push my buttons (no pun).
   "Have a great evening"
   "I'm so glad today is over"
   "Have anything fun planned tonight"
Do they know who they are talking to? I just smile and giggle, "You too," <insert finger in throat>

At least my car is quiet, until I crank up the tunes. AAH!!! Radio Disney!!! ABORT MISSION!!!...I quickly press #4, only to hear the same song I heard yesterday when I got into the car.

<begin head-banger dance moves now> wait for it...Confused Person #1 is now staring at me, followed by a whip lash look away, hoping that they did not make actual eye contact with the crazy lady in the Trailblazer...shucks - I should have picked my nose! ------->>>>>

I am a firm believer in working far enough away from your house so that you experience the "unwind" before you get home and get "winded back up". (Winded...is that a word?) That 30 mins to/fro work may be my only alone time in my day. Sure, there are idiots harassing you the majority of the drive, but your vehicle is like this protective shield that blocks all the crazies.

Teenagers...texting while trying to perfect their knee driving, I would honk but I'm scared they might lose control of their "mom's" car. None of your friends are in a business meeting, use your phone to actually call someone ON YOUR HANDS FREE DEVICE!

50+ladies...these women are proud that their daughter bought them a brand new cellular phone and they are trying to regain their youth through technology. You will see them peering down their noses trying to locate the END button, I would honk but I'm scared their humongous SUV might run me over like a semi.

30 something...you will be happy to know that my age group has perfected the art of multi-tasking. We can call, text, eat, discipline, update schedules, plan dinner, find stuff in our purse, wipe away tears, fix stray hairs, among other things, all while driving.

You should be afraid, very afraid! 85% of the time you will find us either:
1. Screaming at someone on the other end of the phone (I am not guilty of this one), or
2. Looking in our rear view mirror.

Apparently the REAR VIEW MIRROR is the all-knowing PORTHOLE for women in their 30's. My main objectives while gazing into said porthole are:

• Putting on make-up. Yes, I am that girl. I do all my make-up in the morning on the way to work (minus the mascara). I take great pride in my morning commute, no swerving, my green light reaction time is fast. Its not any worse than you eating your Burger King breakfast one the way...
• Disciplining my children. I swear I've pointed my finger at my rear view mirror at least 1,000 x's. Because reaching behind you to find a body part to swat gets a little rambunctious, and the end result is far less effective when up against the dreaded finger point.
• Checking my smile. Who else makes some crazy faces in your mirror? Don't lie! Practice makes Perfect, so I practice my grin many times while driving. Unfortunately...this is how I found my first wrinkle. After that, I created new facial expressions that avoided that wrinkle. I perfected these expressions where, you ask? In my rear view mirror.
• Looking at cars behind me. Lol! This is probably the last use for my rear view mirror...but hey, that's what it is for, right?

Maybe to you, that mirror is what it was made to be. Maybe you tell boss where to stick it on the drive home, that mirror will be there to look back at you and agree. Or maybe you talk to God through that mirror. No matter which direction it faces, you can always adjust it to your specific needs.

At all times, my "porthole" will show me 1/2 of my face, and a full view of my youngest child in his car seat. That way I can check my smile and threaten my children at the same time.

~ And to the 2nd lady on the elevator..."That was just a warm up honey- my day doesn't even begin until I get home!" Thank goodness my rear view mirror will be there on my drive home to help get me there - safe and SANE! What a glorious day...

Stefunny...♥